Welcome to SLsecret, week 386.
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SLSecret: Week 386
· Lourdes Denimore ·
Quick link to the 43 Comments
Before we delve into secrets…
• If you hook up with a crazy in SL, it is not our responsibility to help you deal with that. If it becomes a RL issue contact law enforcement.
• Trust no one. If you tell people your laundry they will air it for you.
• Secret submissions are anonymous. We don’t know if your crazy ex or your abuela submitted them.
• Make your secrets legible.
• Do not contact us just to threaten us, especially with e-lawyers. We’ve been doing this for 12+ years. You are not the first nor will you be the last.
• Lastly, if the material submitted here triggers you, please get help. If the materials submitted here make you suicidal please see the suicide hotline numbers posted. They are there to help.
If you have a graphic with the information for the various other suicide hotlines mentioned send them to Kess to be added with the others.
Hi, wasn’t initially going to post but why not. Firstly thank you for pointing out my Ferns, they are lovely. Secondly, you’re more than welcome to IM inworld and let me know what i’ve said that constitutes me being called a bitch. Thirdly Anorexic is abit harsh. Thanks!
If it’s not fat-shaming, then it’s hurling insults about anorexia. There are no winners here; in fact it’s very definitely a zero-sum game, because there will always be someone who wants the last word.
It’s interesting the number of times people on these pages are subject to age discrimination, being called names like “old whore”, “old woman”, “retarded old people” and last week’s hall-of-famer “old sweaty meaty mutha” etc etc. Even a cursory glance at the photos of RL users on the new FS welcome pages shows that the real age of many SL residents is a lot older than you might think, something I’ve always suspected.
Add to that all the slut-shaming and derogatory references to stay-at-home mothers, people with disabilities and the LGBT community, to name a few more, by contributors and you have a cocktail of hate, jealousy, bigotry and discrimination.
Where I live, by the way, there is federal legislation against cyber-bullying and we happen to have an extradition treaty with the U.S. Penalties include significant monetary fines awarded in civil matters and jail terms up to 14 years for criminal matters, if the bullying has resulted in a suicide. Website administrators who have the power to report and remove material found to constitute cyber-bullying and do not have also been found to be liable. Pointing this out by the way is not a threat… I’m just stating the facts.
I check in here every week because I don’t take any of it too seriously. I set my Zimmer frame aside for a few minutes and have a laugh. However, I can see that others might take the “secrets” and the subsequent posts to heart. Perhaps we should all invest in one of those ‘bubble suits’ to shield ourselves from the crap.
Hahaha passive aggressive much GG
The insults next week oh holy thou Grammar Gal were a play on words reusing the resident troll Whateve’s previous insults and threats on this site, which then resulted her calling me a Faggot trying to belittle me for being gay. Do you think I care? No, I love the fact that she can’t control her emotional outbursts on the internet. Why? Because’s it’s entertaining to read a train wreck like her. I hope she keeps posting imho.
Sorry but you get what you deserve if you post on here either to (a) troll (b) white knight somebody (c) chide other posters.
For others like me, it’s pure entertainment.
Oh sugarplum did you feel belittled, that was never my intention I was simply responding to your awful comments to me. A perfectly natural reaction
I meant last week not next week. That should make it clear.
Ge — I can’t follow what you mean *shrug*.
It’s so boring that you all love me so much. I think i will have to give up my crown I’m simply bored with you now. Goodbye everyone it’s been fun
Yeah you’re American? I am of course making an assumption and could be entirely incorrect. However, I should like to point out that the United States doesn’t have jurisdiction over other parts of the world, therfore your laws would not apply. Something Americans often forget. Not everyone posting here is American.
I personally feel there is far too much credence given to the uploads and comments on this site. Most of it is trolling and shock value. You have a resident troll whom you feed almost daily. You all seem to thrive of the behavior here. So I respectfully fail to understand why continue to contribute to something you clearly find so abhorrent
Indigo — are you asking if I’m American?
This site is getting rather tired. 3 post this week, really?
Honestly the fact that content of this site causes it to require a *suicide hotline link* and you happily continue on with it speaks volumes. Bleeding murderers. All of you.
There have actually been secrets in the past (at least one that I vaguely remember) suggesting that the *submitter* was contemplating suicide. Not all secrets target individuals. Some are from people who are sad, or depressed.
That’s as good a reason as any to have suicide hotline information posted.
The suicide hotline info isn’t there to save lives or a requirement. Seriously if someone wants to off themselves, far be it from me to stop them. It was put there to piss off people.
But that is my take. I think Kess may actually give a shit. She’s the nice one.
While I know that suicide seems to be a joke here, may I ask that you add a few others? The suicide prevention hotline isn’t the most accessible for some internet users, and there are better resources out there for some of the folks who may be using this site.
I highly actually recommend the National Suicide Prevention’s Chatline, as seen here: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/gethelp/lifelinechat.aspx It’s staffed by the same folks as the phone hotline, but is much more accessible if you have issues with voice and talking on the phone. I can tell you from personal experience that the people who work here are not just good about mental illness, but great about LGBT (specifically trans) issues as well. I can’t recommend that enough if you’re on the edge.
Speaking of which, Translifeline is a new suicide hotline opened up just for Trans people. I haven’t had to use them (been months since I last ideated, whoo!) but considering the selfharm rates of trans folks, it’s a good idea for a resource. If you’re trans and feeling wretched, check them out as well. http://www.translifeline.org/
Stay safe, every avatar. The world is a wretch, and the real one aint so hot either. All we got is each other, and if it means one less person kills themself, then that would be cool too.
Bark Bark!
I will add it. Not to be an asshole, though, because it is a good resource.
Just note that I’ll hear until the end of days how I hate another group of people because I posted it.
I’ll take it for the team though.
Translifeline. Good call. Am an operator there. 🙂
Thanks for the shout-out to it.
A fantastic resource, for and by trans people.
Lordes?! You chose your SL name after a saint and participate in this? You must know if you are a true Catholic that encouraging this evil behavior in the world will come back to you. From what I know of you this is not your RL thoughts. But do you really, truly know anyone in SL?!
Lourdes is a small town in France where the Virgin Mary is said to have appeared to three children back in 1858, not a saint.
http://www.medjugorjeusa.org/lourdes.htm. What you feel I’m sure she knows the truth.
Again…..pointing out Lourdes is the TOWN where the Virgin Mary appeared to three children…one of whom was St Bernadette. It’s in the first fricken sentence of the page you linked!!!
There is no St Lourdes.
Saint Lourdes, what have I stumbled upon???? 😉
Hmm, well if my friend who was targeted in this weeks post does indeed harm herself, I will forward the appropriate screen shots. I’m not certain where the creators of this site live, but in my country Cyberbullying is indeed illegal.
Report it to Linode as well. Linode is the hosting site that hosts virtual-secrets. They already have multiple reports in for cyberbullying. Lourdes has been getting lucky that no one has seriously harmed themselves, but if someone does she is criminally negligent according to the TOS from her web provider.
I doubt that that’s true. And how do you know there are reports against this site, did you make them? They are obviously not taken seriously or we wouldn’t still be here.
That is not exactly true. By law the server provider is to collect the reports to show a consistent and patterned behavior of harassing material. Since this site has been used to harass multiple people, and indeed has spread countless slander and untruths, it wont come as a surprise when the grey line is crossed. I was very surprised when the Suicide Hotline was added to this site because it certainly shows that the owner/s of the site is/are aware of what they are posting and this will make a prosecutor drool. Doxing is against the law. Period. Since this site targets a relatively small audience, chances are it will only come to legal ramifications once an individual contacts a lawyer. The archives of this site will be it’s ultimate downfall. It really depends on the situation, but there are plenty of laws that can be invoked and multiple remedies available. Common sense would tell you that bullying or jeopardizing another would be illegal in some way. There are a hoard of ramifications. The scary part is that the site has no idea who they are really targeting. For example, there are consequential specific federal laws, and federal remedies, against doxing federal employees, some for students, some for people of particular races. If you are doxing a non-government person, this can be illegal under various laws that have names such as stalking, cyber stalking, cyber-bullying, harassment, invasion of privacy, threatening, endangering the safety of, intentional infliction of emotional distress, intimidation, and other laws that exist in the different states. Depending on the situation, it might also be a hate crime or a violation of civil rights. Violating the terms of service of the server provider can actually be a federal crime, depending on the situation, and especially so when the… Read more »
Thanks for that information, I’ve only been on the Internet a few weeks and I learned a new word..this “doxing”. Back on IRC this shit happened all the time. ALL.THE.TIME. The difference between then and now is that then people ignored it when someone hurt their feelings on the Internet. In today’s world it seems to be a wonderful badge of courage to carry your status of victimization.
If Lourdes and I see ACTUAL doxxing (i.e. revealing personal information in comments) then we remove it. But, again, we have lives and don’t immediately see things. That is the way it’s been for 7, count that 7, years so if you think that is going to change then you are absolutely out of your mind. Once we see it or are alerted of a violation we remove it (in comments). As always comments are a privilege, not a right.
As for moderation of the content, that is at mine, or Lourdes’ discretion. Most of the people feel that we should know exactly what every secret is about. We don’t. Most people claim to hate us so why would we know who you are if we don’t even hang out in the same circle. Hell, there are people on social media that have me blocked and I have absolutely no fucking clue who they are. Clearly they know who I am, that doesn’t mean I know who they are.
So carry on.
tl;dr – it’s okay, I didn’t read their whole comment either.
Oh that’s fantastic I can now sue everyone here for intended emotional stress, harrasment, distress, defamation of my good character and slander LMAO. lucky for ya’all I don’t give a shit
And if you take the words of an anonymous pseudo e-lawyer wannabe seriously. I have some ocean front property in Nevada I want to sell you.
You all presume much. You never presumed that perhaps since both Kess and I work for a living we can afford an attorney to consult on what goes on on this site. So if you all wanna take a collection of your welfare and disability checks to issue a challenge, let us know.
If you have legal services that are suggesting the content of this site does not break doxing laws, you need to seriously seek new counsel. In fact, even removing this site could never exempt you from the ramifications of a lawsuit, as the site will be retained by the server and a simple warrant would revive the archives. It is definitely a slippery slope, and not one I would tread lightly on.
https://www.wiredsafety.org/toolkitmedia/files/file/Articles/Cyberbullying-Harassment-Stalking_State_Legislation.pdf
Since these doxing activities are made on the internet, the law of any state may be invoked, though most often an investigator will look to the state in which the person making the threat is located, if this is known, or the state in which the victim is situated.
I am definitely relieved to hear you have both secured counsel; it would be a significant advantage to be more prepared than the prosecutor, if it ever came to that. I was worried that you were unknowingly breaking laws and am glad you have your bases covered and finances in order. BTW, make sure you inform your attorney that there is a comment section that discusses the images you upload in depth, which you moderate.
Carry on…. nothing to see here…..
Do me a favor. Point me to the doxxing of a REAL LIFE PERSON not an AVATAR’s name. I’ll remove it. But pointing out avatar’s names is not doxxing. An avatar is an avatar. If you can’t tell the difference between REAL PERSON and AVATAR than you need professional help.
tl;dr: Point me to the doxxing of a REAL person and I’ll gladly remove it. Just stating it exists doesn’t help me since I’m at a loss of where it is. This applies to ANYONE.
So any takers on that beautiful oceanfront property in Vegas? There is also a bridge for sale too.
Yeah, the Anon e-lawyer gave me a chuckle. In my line of work people threaten lawyers all the time. And I welcome them to pursue legal council every single time. Guess how many actually do it? None. Lawyers are expensive. Court is scary and time consuming. Also, lawyers are expensive (I may have mentioned that). People that mostly like to live in virtual worlds don’t usually like to invite too much real life reality. Lawyers and court is a whole lot of real life reality. It should also be noted that this site has been at this for what? Seven years? Good try e-lawyer. You’re quite entertaining though with your doxing talk. 🙂
I appreciate your outrage and anger but if you calculate 386 weeks is about 7 years so your outrage is worn out.
Whichever secret is about your friend, I am sure they aren’t upset at all. This weeks secrets were kind of tame. You really just have to ignore #1 entirely, it’s the lamest secret I’ve seen. Anorexic bone twig? Only a loser says that.
We live in the United States of America. If you are so concerned about your “friend” perhaps you should be spending this time getting her to call a suicide hotline and less time over here talking shit.
You may also want to consult an attorney on what constitutes cyberbullying and who can and cannot be held accountable.
In case you haven’t learned in 386 weeks of Secrets. Threats don’t work.
I’m afraid no, I’ve only just discovered your site. I can see that you can’t really debate with someone who runs a site that revolves around baseless public humiliation. I wish you luck.
You know, you kinda had the beginnings of an interesting comment with the “Honestly the fact that content of this site causes it to require a *suicide hotline link*” , but then your comments went off the rails. Nice try though. Thanks for coming out.
So what you are saying is that you are genuinely happy participating in something that has the very real potential of hurting people to the point of ending their lives, and think that this is okay?
#2-awwww sol made it on the list again he must be so proud <3
Great pic too!
#1
Obviously you must of pissed her off because she is a pretty fabulous person. Trying to make hits saying she is anorexic? How low can you go with attempting to make comments about a persons body without even knowing someone? This woman is a absolute hoot and so kind. You are most likely just mad because her job maintaining something came before bending over backwards for one person. Looks like someone else needs an attitude check. This site takes on secrets as someone writes them over personal opinion. Then there is the second side who KNOWS the other side of things. This is what we call a closed minded person who has nothing better to do with their time then trying to trash a person on a virtual site because someone could not get their way on something. Talk about a temper tantrum virtually. Keep adulting the way you do using this site to make nasty comments about #1. You are doing a great job when they have an entire school of roleplayers who will always back her up. *Raises her wand*
I would wear the sh*t out of that bubble suit, tho. You could totally run into things.
and bounce off on them too! lol