Welcome to SLsecret, week 309.
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SLSecret: Week 309
· Lourdes Denimore ·
Quick link to the 49 Comments
Before we delve into secrets…
• If you hook up with a crazy in SL, it is not our responsibility to help you deal with that. If it becomes a RL issue contact law enforcement.
• Trust no one. If you tell people your laundry they will air it for you.
• Secret submissions are anonymous. We don’t know if your crazy ex or your abuela submitted them.
• Make your secrets legible.
• Do not contact us just to threaten us, especially with e-lawyers. We’ve been doing this for 12+ years. You are not the first nor will you be the last.
• Lastly, if the material submitted here triggers you, please get help. If the materials submitted here make you suicidal please see the suicide hotline numbers posted. They are there to help.
I’m not active in Plurk, or even really come here that often. I don’t know Rose or anything about her situation so no judgments coming from me.
But the big lesson I get just from perusing this is: Don’t put details about your personal life out in a public forum, because people sure will take those juicy little tidbits and RUN with it.
I find this whole dialogue to be rather pointless. If someone is having financial hardship and is trying to find a way to make ends meet, it is not a joke or something to be open to ridicule. When you open yourself up to others and ask for money, as opposed to try to fund raise or create content to sell for your own support, you can expect a certain amount of judgement from others, but no one is ever required to spend their own money on anyone else’s cause. If you did so, and you feel ‘duped’, consider it a lesson learned. It happens to all of us in SL at least once. NO ONE has a right to judge how or in what way someone spends their own money. I am on a very limited income with increasing medical expenses, but if I decide to spend money on something others may see as frivolous, that is their problem, not mine. Everyone deserves a little pleasure in their lives, and sometimes having something to look forward to even when in a tight financial bind is all you have keeping you from giving up entirely to despair. If you choose to support someone, that is a very kind and selfless thing to do, and likely much appreciated, but unless specified, you cannot control how others will use your ‘contributions’. Give where your heart and your head agree it will be best used. I don’t know this Rose person, I didn’t donate to this person, I could not afford to frankly, and I would NEVER ask others for financial support, but that is my choice. I think people need to step back and stop dissecting this woman, her life, living arrangement, activities in and out of SL, and choices for leisure… Read more »
I wish this many people spoke up when you all handed Curio $20k usd, for that sham of a fund raiser. I bet Curio had two great vacations with all that cash you blindly gave her.
There is a big difference, the curio case was because of DMCA, of which she was innocent.
She had to close her store for a long time, she couldn’t earn money with.
Is that with Olive Store too?
i don’t think so.
Compare apples to oranges.
Since our good friend Sash has chose to call us all names and tell us how stupid we are for saying anything at all about the behavior some of us don’t deem acceptable. Hate to say it Sash it costs money to go to Disney if you want to admit it or not. A bottle of water, a coke, a dinner, Alcohal, or whatever. It is all expensive. On top of all this the plurks of oh I’m buying this and that for this trip to Disney.. So you kind of shot yourself in the foot with none of us know. Some of us have a pretty good idea she spent at least a few hundred dollars. No one just rolls over and doesn’t realize the old parents aren’t paying the mortgage bill. You would have to have your head buried in the sand not to realize your parents probably can’t pay the bills.
I’m sorry… but I find this all too funny. Rose is behaving much like a child… maybe that’s why she plays at a camp and acts like one? But that, my friends, is not the point. One of the people so insistent on defending her, is also one of the biggest hypocrites I have ever seen. Sorry sweetums, but being a creator give your opinions no weight in my book. You’re, well, you’re a bitch. OMG how dare someone call your friend out on her immature behavior!! Dat’s lyke, 5evar not cool, rite? If she has so many issues, and being a creator is soooo expensive, then maybe she should… Stop? What a concept, right? Stop doing something that’s super expensive and time consuming and hard? I know it’s hard for you to keep up, but please… try. Hold in that raging bitchy attitude that you think is cute and just read. I’ll make sure to use small words that you can grasp. You, m’dear, have no right to call other people a bitch or tell them how inappropriate (oops, sorry.. big word there) their behavior is when it’s well known, Sash, that you are the type who would attack someone for simply, existing in SL with bling or a cheap skin. HOW DARE THEY!?!? You act like your shit comes out smelling like roses and when something goes wrong for you, you cry to plurk about being sick and how everyone else is always the problem. But what I find extremely amusing, is that there are thousands of SL users who never encounter the sort of issues that you seem to have. People don’t call them out on their bratty behavior. They don’t get into senseless drama. Do you know why? Because they act like decent human beings who… Read more »
What do you expect from someone batshit crazy enough to have a picture of a dead baby in her SL profile?
So, we all rally together and stop the foreclosure. Then what? How do we know that she’s going to grow up and get a real job to stop this happening again in the next few months?
I would imagine finding a job that would help the foreclosure situation would be difficult for her because she is a high school drop out. She is not even capable of doing what is necessary to get a GED.
How many people know her truely? How many can say its true?
There’s no smoke without fire.
And honestly if i got a hard time RL, i care for RL instead of sitting in a virtual world.
and to that:
“You guys dont’ realize what cashing out is, really. A house can’t be paid by what most of us make from SL. Even during arcade. Why? We also have expenses in SL. We have to pay for the store, the events, all of that. It’s not free to run a store. So let’s get that clear, actually, it’s quite expensive for most of us, and no matter what, there will always be costumers that complain.”
Costumers buy if they like the stuff, they pay with their real money.
And if i’m broke, how can i have “expensive job”.
I know creators have a lot to deal with… but without costumers?
What would happen if tomorrow SL isnt there anymore?
Don’t get me wrong, but you can find a job, not the one you wish for, but at least one to pay your bills.
Most parents don’t share their financial situations with their kids, so unless she was snooping through their mail or listening in on phone calls, she wouldn’t know of the situation until they told her of it. Don’t assume because somebody went on vacation that they paid any of it. My parents have some financial problems, but we’ve all been through a lot together over the years, and I do well financially, so I paid for all of us to take a week (to FL also actually). They didn’t pay a cent. Most likely nobody knows of their financial problems, but if somebody does, and heard of our vacation as well, I’d hate to think that they’d be criticizing my parents because of a vacation that I gave them. I doubt anybody here knows the amount Rose spent, if she spent anything at all. Her friends could’ve helped her out tremendously. And if they did, they CHOSE to do so. I would guess she didn’t hold a gun to their head and force it. In the same way, nobody is holding a gun to anybody’s head here and forcing them to participate in any fundraiser. If the responses are meant to “teach her a lesson” or “teach her what RL is like” then you’re probably failing at your approach. Most people become closed off when offensive approaches and language is taken with them. There are better, more mature ways of going about things. I’m surprised most of you have successful jobs if that’s the way you communicate with people. I don’t know Rose, but from her RL tab picture, she looks young. Young adults take time to find their footing in life. They stumble, make mistakes, are occasionally irresponsible, try various jobs (including ones like SL, yes), etc. If you think… Read more »
Well said!
So far this year I have had two brushes with cancer.
However, I have not brought my RL problems into SL or Plurk for that matter. In fact, this is the first forum where I have mentioned it and I do so anonymously because I do not want sympathy, gossip about me or $$$.
Quite some years ago, I remember a fundraising event being held for someone who was described as ‘gravely ill’. I understand that a considerable amount of money was raised. After a short absence, the resident made a miraculous recovery. I know I wasn’t the only one suspicious of the whole drama and so I made a decision to not give money again to anyone on SL with their hand out for charity.
People don’t always tell you who or what they are, but their actions speak volumes.
WOOOOOO – the C word, even! I leave for two years, come back and find that this place is still OVERFLOWING with secretive catty assholes. I guess I’m one of them, though, since I’m reading SL Secrets. 😉
Shame, shame, SHAME on all of us, kids!
Now let’s all pause for a moment and hold hands and sing “Kumbaya.” 😀
Are you a little slow?
No, she is just delightful!
I don’t know all of the details about this and while I do sympathize with the situation, as someone pointed out foreclosure is not a sudden thing. It happens over time and there are programs in place to help people avoid that. You just have to look for them.
Secondly, if caregiving prevents someone from working in rl who could make more outside the home, there are organizations that will assist with that end of the responsibility. I don’t know this person or what her home situation is, but there are things like adult “day care” and that sort of thing. It’s all a matter of doing your research about social provided by your local, state, and federal government along with hospitals and other medical facilities in your area.
A lot of us who have stores in SL also have RL jobs that are 40+ hour a week. We have families, aging parents, homes, and a lot of responsibilities resting on our shoulders. That’s life. It sucks a lot of the time, but that’s reality.
I think that if friends want to help her directly and she wants to have a sale with her expenses in mind, that’s great, but don’t solicit the help of creators who don’t know her personally and have their own responsibilities to participate.
Most banks are willing to work with one of these US Government programs to help stop foreclosures.
I have to agree with those claiming she’s frivolous and needs to face reality. Many people with jobs that they commit 24/7 to in order to put food on the table don’t grovel for others to pay the bills they can’t afford. Everyone has their hardship…yah she takes care of her sick mother but heck so do I and I work my arse off everyday…live paycheck to paycheck and still have bills I’m late on. I don’t go to Disney world…heck i don’t even go to six flags that is an hour away because i can’t throw money away. Yet she can spend a week or so at Disney world and not even have a real life job. Foreclosure doesn’t come overnight…you can’t be blind that your parents are having financial troubles when you’re living with them and in your 20s. So you work in sl…well then from what i can see a lot of her “hard” earned money is spent on a new look every day! She just plurks about all her new things and now they’re fundraising for her. Wow…must be nice to have gotten drunk in Didney…with the rich of sl. Grow up little pit this is real life…virtual camp is over…pick up a job application or 2
Are you saying that working in Sl products is easy? Cute. Let’s see you try and see just how long you last 🙂
Working in SL is considerably easier than my job. So it is kind of easy 🙂
I have worked in sl before. No not saying it’s easy but it’s nothing in comparison to the work I do in rl.
Payments
The first step down the road to foreclosure is a missed payment—not simply a late payment. Mortgage companies usually give their borrowers a grace period of 10 to 15 days to get their payments in, so if you occasionally make a payment within a week or two after the deadline, you’re still OK. If you pay after the grace period, you’ll get hit with a late fee, but your payment is not officially “missed” until it’s 30 days late.
Foreclosure
Once you miss a payment, your lender will probably give you a call or send you a letter asking what’s up. When you miss two payments in a row, these contacts will intensify. And if you miss three in a row, you’ll get something called a “demand letter” in the mail. Also known as a “notice to accelerate,” this letter notifies you that your mortgage is delinquent, tells you how much you are behind, and orders you to get current on your payments within 30 days. If that period passes and you haven’t acted, your home is going into foreclosure. Depending on state requirements, it can take anywhere from a few months to more than a year for a home to go from the first missed payment to a foreclosure auction. In California, for example, it typically takes about 120 days, according to the website United States Foreclosure Laws.
I love on how you all just throw around accusations and bullshit just because you stand around without showing your names. This is why I don’t come to this website. I don’t respect any of you, and I don’t care what you think of me, and the secrets you post about me, because, like I said, unless I’m directed here, I don’t even think about this place. I don’t like spending my time with people that have nothing to do but trash talk others. With that being said, I love how you all talk shit about Rose. I came here to defend her, because she’s a friend, no matter what, and I will stand by her on this. I didn’t know about her fundraiser, my health kept me away, but now that I do, and any of the organizers planning this, I’m on this, 100% proceeds to her. You guys dont’ realize what cashing out is, really. A house can’t be paid by what most of us make from SL. Even during arcade. Why? We also have expenses in SL. We have to pay for the store, the events, all of that. It’s not free to run a store. So let’s get that clear, actually, it’s quite expensive for most of us, and no matter what, there will always be costumers that complain. So she didn’t manage to make 12 gifts? I know she made a few. So let’s cut that stuff out, sometimes rl shit happens, or sometimes, we get busy. It’s just a matter of a fact, and money comes first, sadly, I would love to do more group gifts, but I find myself struggling just to keep up with what I have going on. I can’t even imagine what’s on her plate. So she went on that… Read more »
I’m also disgusted by the comments happening here. Rose’s friends are putting on an event for her because they love her, and I’m sure she would do the same for any of them. She’s not throwing the event herself and she never asked anyone to do it, but it’s happening because of the wonderful person she is. If you don’t agree with it, that’s fine, but you all need to stop acting like you know anything about her personal finances.
As for the whole “OH SHE’S SHOPPING BLAH BLAH BLAH GOING TO DISNEYLAND BLAH BLAH BLAH.” What you’re saying is that she needs to sit and make things on SL all day long 24/7 and never have any fun or buy anything? That because she doesn’t have money, she’s not entitled to any luxuries and only people who are born with money deserve nice things. It’s no one’s business what she spends her money on but her.
It’s that she sits on SL ALL DAY ‘making things’. Go out and get a real job. You don’t have to love it or like it, but that’s what adults do. They make sacrifices and don’t waste money needlessly. She never NEEDED to go on vacation. I haven’t gone on one in nearly 8 years and yet, no one has ever seen me bitching. I don’t spend money I don’t have, even if it is only 20 dollars. That is how a responsible adult handles things.
If she was at SL camp for a week, I can kind of see why people would assume she was playing a game rather than working. I can also see how someone who retreats from reality by heading for SL might also be tempted to retreat from reality by heading to Disneyworld. (By the way, there is quite a bit more expense involved in a Disney vacation than the price of admission. People need to eat, for example.)
But that’s not really anyone else’s business. It’s virtual begging, not virtual mugging; nobody HAS to give her anything, and if others choose to, that’s entirely up to them.
I know that there are expenses to it. When I go to Six flags with my husband, even though we don’t pay for the ticket or anything other than the trip (60 on gas for both ways) But when we’re there, only about 20 on food, since we try to not eat as much there, price of food is incredibly high. Still, you can’t judge a person for wanting to escape and have some fun in their lives, that’s just ridic.
ANY kind of vacation is frivolous. It’s not something that is required to live or survive. Doesn’t matter if you live 2000 miles from the place you visit or 20 miles. Even if you save for a vacation you don’t NEED to go on one, the money could be used for more practical things.
Going on vacation is a choice someone makes. Foreclosure doesn’t happen overnight so choosing to spend ANY amount of money on something as frivolous as a vacation is ridiculous. I’m pretty sure as a grown ass woman who lives with her parents she would be well aware of any financial situations that arise. She’s not a 6 year old who doesn’t quite understand what’s going on.
Holding a fundraiser for her is beyond a fucking joke. Nobody should be duped into paying for her frivolous choices. I’m thinking of starting my own fundraiser because I quite fancy a trip to Disney Land too.
Fully able bodied people will find work if they look for it and keep trying, even if it’s just moping floors. There are plenty of people out there who aren’t able bodied who would love to work and can’t get anyone to employ them for anything or can’t even get handouts to cover their asses. The reason she can’t get a RL job is because she spends all day in SL making sub standard hair and/or on Plurk… I don’t call that busting her ass looking for a job.
Wow. Okay. You obviously don’t know her or her struggles, so please, move on to a concept that you know something about.
You want to know what’s frivolous? Pretending you have the answers to life, and judging others. I really hope I don’t know you. She doesn’t own her own house. She lives with her parents. Takes care of her mom, and what do you do with your life? Sit there and throw shit at her for working her ass off at trying to solve a problem she might not even have known at the time she was going to face. Maybe if you took a second to see the whole picture instead of wanting to throw drama other people’s life and judging them. This is ridiculous. Get a life and stop throwing shit on those that are going through a hard time, and struggling to be happy. I hope something like this never happens to you.
I don’t think frivolous means what you think it means…
Awww poor baby. She’s clearly SO hard done by. How has she coped in life so far? People have it a shit ton worse than her, don’t get to fuck off to Disney Land on vacation and still manage to not have ‘benefits’ thrown for them or have to beg people for money to get by.
The situation I’m in right now is way more fucked up than hers but you don’t see me begging for money from other people to fix it.
Is she planning on looking after her mother on the streets when they lose the house or do you think maybe her getting off her ass and getting a job to try and keep the house would serve her mother better?
My partner takes care of me by working his goddamn fucking ass off every god given hour to make sure we don’t lose our house, have food on our table and clothes on our backs.
Clearly SL is more important than helping to provide for her struggling family.
No not a fucking hypocrite. If you’d read you’d see I said I was in a worse position than her.
For your information I’m physically disabled. I can’t walk and use a wheelchair. I have applied for a BILLION and one jobs and nobody wants to hire the disabled girl in the wheelchair. So no, I’m not a fucking hypocrite. My partner works to provide for both of us.
Just like she should work to provide for her mother rather than fuck off to Disney World and waste money that is obviously desperately needed if she’s now having a benefit thrown to keep her fucking house.
Asshole.
>My partner takes care of me by working his goddamn fucking ass off every god given hour to make sure we don’t lose our house, have food on our table and clothes on our backs.
Hypocrite much?
Did you all just seriously cast a stone at the poor girl for your misinformed baseline knee jerk opinion?
Do you really think you have enough info for this slander? Because that’s what this is.
Oh dear, yah this girl is well known, i remember her around christmas, as she said, join my group for 12 days of christmas, you will get every day a special gift.
What came? Guess what… nuffin…
and she is on Arcade, so she shouldn’t be poor in SL…
Such people stop others for doing charity… for real causes…
It’s a shame..
Whats her name? I need to know because I regularly donate to people with financial problems. I dont want to in the future donate to this person who obviously doesnt deserve it.
The girl who owns Olive. Her name is Rose. Don’t get me wrong she seems like a nice enough person, but this is just not what should be happening. I am very sorry her family has fallen in hard times but I know 10 other people I could name who have a hard time putting food on their plates, not only for them but their small children. people who work for a living and still struggle hard. They aren’t begging for a hand out. why is it ok for her? Cause she’s known? Cause she’s Sl popular? I dint think so.
She NEVER asked for help. It was offered.
No the vacation was when she went to Disneyworld with a group of Sl people. Not the camp stuff. If it was the 1000l or whatever for camp people wouldn’t be as taken aback by this.
But she just took a vacation to Disney World at the end of may and being frivolous. Now wants us to bail her parents out of foreclosure with a fundraiser so she can what sit on her ass and play SL? Must be nice to be frivolous but not be able to pay your mortgage. Someone who spends all day on plurk and whines about things constantly. Claiming SL as your job should mean its a viable means of financial support that you can pay all your bills in a timely manner. If you are not making this kind of money then its time to face reality and get off your ass and get a real job. What happens in 1, 5, 10 years when its gone or you no longer make any income. What then? Living at home with your parents and having no idea what life really entails without sitting online 24/7 and plurking is not reality. With this fundraiser will we be seeing another frivolous trip to Disney World again in the near future? How do we really know?
From her profile : On vaction the week of July 12-20th
I don’t know, i got a real job, i can’t afford more then one vacation in the year.
Well okay , i pay it by myself.
That was SL camp.
That vacation was an SL vacation, Camp Hardknock. They are not allowed to leave the sim once they get there. Get your facts straight before you start making more accusations.
She owns the store Olive.
#9 you totally forgot to add how she went to Disney world and blew God knows how much. Perhaps that money could have helped get them out of this mess. But no, vacationing was more important. I am all for helping people in are times, but I don’t see her out looking for a real job I see her crying on plurk and now those decent people are the ones who are going to give their time and talent for what? So she can sit home and play Sl all day and plurk? She is able bodies, she needs to go out and get herself a grown up job.
So tired of people having fundraisers for shit. If you have financial issues do something about it in real life. Stop relying on SL to pay your bills. Go out an get a REAL job with a steady paycheck. Maybe you should of used some of that money you spent at Disney World to pay your real life bills. Throwing away money on pleasure when you do not have it is a bit stupid.
And no finding work isn’t easy but that’s not the stuff we hear about her doing. She has readily said Sl is her job, she maybe didn’t know about this when she went to Disney but it is irresponsible when you aren’t working living with your parents not in school to go blow money like that. You can’t brag about all that and then be surprised when this happens and some of are wtfing because now you want us to help pay for it. A lot of us have serious life issues and I know for a fact of one other person in your same hole and they aren’t here crying about it, they are trying to find a solution not trying to get us to pick up the check.
Asshole. She helps take care of her Mom while at home. And in case you haven’t noticed, the economy is SHIT right now and it’s almost impossible to actually be able to even afford a place by yourself anymore, so even if she wasn’t helping her family, she’d probably still be stuck there, just like a good percentage of young adults in the rest of the United States.